take a baby step to forget you

My sight is blur, coz my eyes full of tears
Now i can smile, later i will cry
I can strong and tough in front of people,
but i always weak and suffering by myself.
Missing u, is the most unbearable feelin.
Missing ur smile, ur touch, ur kiss.
Learning to accept those thing is not mine anymore.
My heart still bleeding inside..
Feel like im taking a baby step to forget you.
Trying to put my head up, to face the world
To be a better person in the future

Damn it!!

Damn it!! I never thought this will make me so damn sad!!
Damn it!! I never realized u mean so much for me.
Damn it!! Why we should ended like this
Damn it!! Wish im strong enough to survive

Damn it, Damn it, Damn it!!
I realized i love you so much and i dont wanna lose you!

Separuh jiwa ku pergi

Ya.. seperti lagu si Anang waktu di tinggal KD,
separuh jiwa ku pergi
Ini yang aku rasain sekarang..
Rasanya ada yang hilang dalam hidup ku..
Ada ruangan kosong di hatiku.
Bolong, kosong, dan melompong..
gak ada yang bisa gantiin ato nempatin.

Rasanya separuh jiwa ku melayang pergi ntah kemana.
Pengen mati ajarasanya
kadang pikir gak sanggup, kadang mikir harus kuat..

Kenapa harus ada cinta??
kenapa harus ada cinta kalo akhirnya kaya gini?
Bener2 ngerasa separuh jiwa, raga, hidup, hati aku pergi melayang jauh..
Mati segan hidup tak mau.

God please give me strengh and serenity to pass all this problem
coz without ur help, im not even sure i will survive

undelivered poem

Three years together
not even make me love you less.
I love you more & more
not because you are handsome, tall, smart or different.
I love you, because you are you.
My best boyfriend ever!

We both make mistakes,
coz we just human.
None of those thing change our love
coz our love is stronger than those thing.
I know you are not perfect, so am I,
but I accepeted your with your unperfectness.

I feel blessed and thanked
for every moment that we spent,
coz I have you in my life.
Im courious and excited
to spend the rest of my life with you.
My best boyfriend ever!

Dedicated to someone.
Too bad i cant even hope to spend the rest of my life with you.
I love you

Buah simalakama

Pernah denger tentang buah simalakama??
Gak dimakan ibu mati,
dimakan bapak mati.
Ungkapan ini buat menggambarkan keadaan serba salah,
dimana seseorang harus memilih dua hal yang sama-sama penting.

Bayangin kalo harus ada di posisi kaya gitu..
gimana ceritanya yah??
dua duanya penting, dua duanya berarti

Ahh.., tau akh..
daripada pusing ngebayangin,
mending tidur..

Memaafkan

Kemaren baru liat buku di bazaar buku bekas
ada kutipan isinya gini
"sekali kita terluka
kita tidak akan pernah sembuh
sebelum kita memaafkan"

Gubrakkk!! Dalem banget itu kutipan yah..
Jadi kepikiran, bener gak sih kunci semuanya adalah memaafkan??

Emang kalo udah disakitin bisa segampang itu memaafkan..
its easy to say, but it aint easy to do
walaupun nih mulut bilang..
"aku sudah maafin kamu"
belum tentu hatinya bener-bener udah maafin

lagian kadang orang-orang tenggelam dalam rasa maaf palsu
yang mereka ciptakan sendiri dengan harapan bisa sembuh dari luka hati..
padahal kalo di pikir-pikir kog seperti ngebohongin diri sendiri yah..

mungkin maaf palsu itu bisa menenangkan sebentar,
tapi wong namanya juga palsu..
ibarat besi di sepuh emas..
lama-lama balik lagi ke warna asalnya..

sama kaya hati
tenang sebentar, kadang masih bisa bergejolak dan sakit
ini kalo memaafkannya gak tulus loh..

tapi gimana sih caranya supaya bisa memaafkan dengan tulus??
lupain semuanya??
hmm... orang bilang ngelupain malah lebih susah dari maafin seseorang..

am i still attractive?

Baby am I still attractive??
am I still interesting in ur eyes??
or i just like no body

Why i didnt get that look lately??
look that u gave to me the first time we met
look that tell me that im beautifull
without u speak it..

Why i feel like im no body lately..
I feel u not recognized me..
I feel invisible to you,
like im not real

Im real baby, im so real
Please turn your head and eyes
from that stupid computer
and look at me!!